In no particular order:
1. Alex Trebek: Alex Trebek, the host of Jeopardy, is super-annoying to me. I love the show, and my wife and I enjoy playing along. Alex, on the other hand, possesses a subtle type of pompousness that just gets me fired up. He has all of the answers on the screen in front of him, so why must he correct the contestants as if his intelligence is so impressive? Each evening, it is inevitable that he says something that aggravates me, but I tolerate his presumptuousness for the sake of the game.
2. Experts: By experts, I am referring to individuals who have a highly-specific, even esoteric knowledge of a particular field who, for whatever reason, assume that everyone else on the earth has the same particular knowledge. In other words, I don't want a mechanic to speak to me as if I should be completely aware of every facet of my truck's engine. I don't expect
him to be able to produce a thesis statement evaluating the parallels between Orwell's vision of a dystopic society and the modern politics of North Korea under Kim Jong Il. The world doesn't revolve around you (or me), and if I, along with others, had a pre-existing knowledge of engine mechanics, you would be unemployed.
3. Phil Simms: He's the former Giants quarterback who works as a game analyst/announcer for the NFL on NBC. He just plain old bothers me. What bothers me even more is the fact that I cannot articulate exactly why he bothers me; he just does.
4. Parking Near Me: Don't park near me. I park, in most cases, as far away from other cars as possible, yet often I return from a place of business to find a vehicle parked uncomfortably close to my truck in some subconscious attempt to make my vehicle feel less isolated. There are hundreds of free spots; why is there a need to bump doors? Go away.
5. Snobs: When I worked in catering, I learned a lot about how people treat individuals when they are functioning in a position of "service". When I would "serve" people, they seemed to adopt an attitude of not only social- but intellectual- superiority. They spoke to me as if I were an idiot, assuming that my choice of employment must be a direct result of a lackluster intellect. Now, I put special effort into treating people who "serve" me not as servants but as human beings who should not be categorized by their occupation, no matter how menial.
6. "Hon": I don't like it when women call me "hon", especially when they are younger than I am. My mother, grandmother, and wife, along with elderly women, are allowed to call me "hon".
7. Sports Regurgitators: A sports regurgitator is someone who: a) is a devotee of
Sportcenter and talk radio and b) regurgitates or otherwise recycles sports-related ideas and opinions of others in an attempt to pass them off as their own.
8. People Who Don't Pull Forward at Drive-Thru's: Congratulations, you've placed your order! But you're job is not done. There are seven people behind you, all of whom have not placed theirs, so creep on forward to allow others to do so.
9. "Could Care Less": It is I "couldn't care less". "Could care less" implies the existence of a level of care; "couldn't care less" implies a level of care so minuscule it is impossible to care less. So, "could care less"= I care. I try not to be an English snob (this would violate PP #5), but this one is so widespread it tends to bother me.
10. Strangers at My Door: I chose my dog, a Bullmastiff, because I feel an animal should contribute to the family in some way. I feel like dogs should earn their kibble. Bullmastiffs were originally bred to pursue and attack poachers in rural England. They still don't bark much, because barking would give humans an opportunity to escape and take the fun out of actually catching someone. So, essentially, their function is to protect their home from intruders. Ramona is gentle and goofy with her family and loved ones but she is suspicious of strangers. If the Comcast guy comes to fix the table, Mona makes it abundantly clear, via body language alone, that he is not allowed to give as much as a dirty look to anyone in the house. I live in a fairly large development, the type of neighborhood perfect for Halloween and ideal for door-to-door solicitation. My dog makes strangers very uncomfortable, and they seem to question why I would keep such a beast. The irony is that, in their discomfort, is their answer. Maybe I'm a hobbit.
What are some of your Pet Peeves?
